Depressed

So I have been dealing with pain since the beginning of August.   And as a result of that pain, I get depressed and I eat bad food to comfort myself. 
While I am doing it, I hear the me who wants to be healthy screaming at the me eating Oreos, "No! Stop it!!!!! Please I am begging you to stop!".  And like a bully, I just keep going and tormenting and breaking myself down until I am standing on the scale, 6lbs heavier and 2 months later...the more I try to stick to the diet, the less self control I have..."oh well it is Olivia's birthday--I can have cake." And while when I look in the mirror and still see me from January, my clothes are telling me that I am not the same me from June.  I get back up on the wagon and immediately jump back off.  My new clothes still fit but some things are a little more snug, or not as big as they were before...

So I think it is time to refocus and set a goal like I used to at the beginning of my relationship with IP.

I am recommiting myself to IP as of Sunday, which will give me time to get what I need in the house and what I dont need out.  Plus it is Olivia's birthday today and her party is Saturday.

Short Term:
Actually get to my IP center and pick up shakes that I like...
Get back to salad and soup for lunch for an entire week
Get back to AM and PM weigh in because that kept me in track
Get back to weekly weigh in at my IP center now that PT is over.

Long Term
Stick to IP and by November 20th be down 5lbs for a total of 45lbs down

Continue until Christmas and by December 25th reach 52lbs down.

And by January 11, 2014, reach 57lbs down and goal for my 1 year IP anniversary.

And suddenly I am feeling a little better...taking control again...