"You Look Great! How Much Weight Have You Lost?"
Something has been bothering me!!
Did you know that it is apparently inappropriate or rude to tell someone (especially a woman) that she looks great combined with a comment or question about weight?
It's some unspoken rule among I'm not sure who...
Ok, I don't want to offend anyone but the thought process is that it is okay to tell a woman that she looked great. It is ok to tell her she looks fit or healthy but when you combine the "You look great, did you lose weight?" that's supposed to be OFFENSIVE. Because APPARENTLY, it implies that said woman didn't look great BEFORE.
Ahem. Let me clear the air. I don't care if you tell me I look great because I lost weight. 'Cause ya know what? I DO. And ya know what? I didn't look GREAT before. I looked OKAY. And maybe somebody thought I had some GREAT days but for the most part I didn't look my best and I was just OKAY.
But not just because I lost weight...that's the part YOU see. You (or anyone) looks at me and thinks "What is different about Annie?" and your eyes SEE that I'm taking up less space, my clothes are different, nicer, closer to my body...so your first thought is based on what you see.
So, let's say we've never talked but you work in my building...you've seen me walking down the hall, we've avoided eye contact...never really spoken, maybe an occasional hi or holding of a door or elevator...aware of each others existence....but today, I smile at you and say hi...there's a spring in my step, something is different? You look at me...and you think "She looks great, I wonder if she lost weight?"
What your brain is picking up is that I am happier, more outgoing, smiling, glowing...If you are someone who pays particular attention to these things, you'd notice that my hair is thicker, my skin is brighter...I am more appealing emotionally and physically and in some cases mentally.
Because I changed my diet, I lost weight (physical), my hair and skin is better (physical), I am happier because my hair and skin look better, my clothes fit (emotional) and I have more energy because of the fuel I put in my body is better. Because I am happier, I invite and exude happiness, making me a much more pleasant person to be around. I am more confident, which tends to attract people...mostly because I'm talking to more of them now instead of hiding in my own skin. I'm no longer worried that someone is judging me the entire time I'm talking--too busy picking me apart and not really hearing me. (Woah, wait, what? Yea. Welcome to my head. I just said that. I used to feel like people were judging me...people who didn't already know me, I mean....)
So please, tell me I look great and ask me how much weight I lost because while I'm standing there talking to you, you'll realize that it wasn't just weight I lost, it was an emotional burden and mental anguish. And you'll have totally just made my day for noticing.
Thank you. That is all.
Did you know that it is apparently inappropriate or rude to tell someone (especially a woman) that she looks great combined with a comment or question about weight?
It's some unspoken rule among I'm not sure who...
Ok, I don't want to offend anyone but the thought process is that it is okay to tell a woman that she looked great. It is ok to tell her she looks fit or healthy but when you combine the "You look great, did you lose weight?" that's supposed to be OFFENSIVE. Because APPARENTLY, it implies that said woman didn't look great BEFORE.
Ahem. Let me clear the air. I don't care if you tell me I look great because I lost weight. 'Cause ya know what? I DO. And ya know what? I didn't look GREAT before. I looked OKAY. And maybe somebody thought I had some GREAT days but for the most part I didn't look my best and I was just OKAY.
But not just because I lost weight...that's the part YOU see. You (or anyone) looks at me and thinks "What is different about Annie?" and your eyes SEE that I'm taking up less space, my clothes are different, nicer, closer to my body...so your first thought is based on what you see.
So, let's say we've never talked but you work in my building...you've seen me walking down the hall, we've avoided eye contact...never really spoken, maybe an occasional hi or holding of a door or elevator...aware of each others existence....but today, I smile at you and say hi...there's a spring in my step, something is different? You look at me...and you think "She looks great, I wonder if she lost weight?"
What your brain is picking up is that I am happier, more outgoing, smiling, glowing...If you are someone who pays particular attention to these things, you'd notice that my hair is thicker, my skin is brighter...I am more appealing emotionally and physically and in some cases mentally.
Because I changed my diet, I lost weight (physical), my hair and skin is better (physical), I am happier because my hair and skin look better, my clothes fit (emotional) and I have more energy because of the fuel I put in my body is better. Because I am happier, I invite and exude happiness, making me a much more pleasant person to be around. I am more confident, which tends to attract people...mostly because I'm talking to more of them now instead of hiding in my own skin. I'm no longer worried that someone is judging me the entire time I'm talking--too busy picking me apart and not really hearing me. (Woah, wait, what? Yea. Welcome to my head. I just said that. I used to feel like people were judging me...people who didn't already know me, I mean....)
So please, tell me I look great and ask me how much weight I lost because while I'm standing there talking to you, you'll realize that it wasn't just weight I lost, it was an emotional burden and mental anguish. And you'll have totally just made my day for noticing.
Thank you. That is all.
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