Giving in to Cravings

Things I am currently craving:

(Note: I don’t regularly eat these things so I am not sure why I am craving them)

Key lime pie, specifically the buttery graham cracker crust

Bacon Egg and Cheese biscuit sandwich—specifically the biscuit

Italian Hoagie with mayo, oil, vinegar, lettuce and tomato on a fresh long roll

I am noticing a theme….bread.  The Key Lim Pie is an odd one but I think that comes from wanting something salty sweet…that salty crust with the sweet and tangy filling. Yum.

Fortunately, those who have blazed the IP diet trail before me have figured out a way to make mini key lime pies.  No graham cracker crust but, I bet it would satisfy my craving.  I need IP supplies to complete it and I think I will save them as a reward for meeting a weight loss goal.  While they are completely in the program, I don’t want to start treating myself so early on that I treat myself right off the diet.

Speaking of going off the diet…

Last night I had a cheese steak, M&Ms (specifically coconut M&Ms),  a breakfast sandwich and other things completely off the diet.  And the more I tried to stop eating those restricted items, the worse it got.  I felt so guilty but I couldn’t stop eating.  I told myself that I would recover with the next meal but it just kept getting worse! And I felt awful…guilty and sick from eating all of that terrible food.  My clothes felt tighter and the last 10 days of my life were a complete waste.

And then I woke up. My heart was pounding.  I felt sick with guilt.  Everyone would be so disappointed in me.  I’ve spent all of this money…and for what?  Nothing!  I just ate back all the pounds I lost!

And then I had to reason with myself…”Did I just eat all that? Wait, what day is it?  What did I have for dinner?   No…that was diet approved…wait…no I had an IP Lemon Pudding for snack…only one restricted yesterday…had them remove the carrots from my salad…I followed everything, right?”

It felt SO real!  Until I got downstairs and showered was I able to convince myself that it didn’t happen!  There was a .6lb loss on the scale, which is great!  It’s in the right direction.

So in the end…after all of my cravings…I think that my dream told me that giving into my cravings isn’t worth it.  The guilt alone was horrifying.  I was totally enjoying being in control of my food and my weight loss for the first time ever and I lost control in my dream.